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trashmagicxo:

mjolkk:

oh my god i’m at the grocery store and there is a guy in the frozen section who is tweaked off his balls on some kind hallucinatory drug. 

i’m in the next isle meowing softly through the cereal boxes where he can’t see me and he is losing his shit pulling pizza boxes out of the freezers and yelling that he needs to save the popsicle cat 

am i a bad person  

I love you

kink-182:

tom-sits-like-a-whore:

reasons to date me

  • no pressure to wear pants in my presence
  • or any clothes at all really
  • but it’s up to you
  • u can be big spoon or little spoon
  • totally your choice
  • i’m always ready to make out
  • aLwaYs
  • also u don’t even have to buy me things just maybe an ice cream cone every once in a while that’s it 
  • i’ll let you lick it though
  • i mean the ice cream cone
  • well not just the ice cream cone

omfg yes

"Having a soft heart in a cruel world is courage, not weakness."

egg-rolls:

so we watched this extremely sad film in my psychology class and i didn’t want to cry at the end so i was sitting there clenching my fists and thinking to myself “don’t you fucking cry you are a GROWN MAN” and then after like a minute i realized im a sixteen year old girl

"
  1. Always take pictures of the sky when it’s pretty, it probably won’t ever look like that again.
  2. Wear that skirt you like, even if you’re mom says it’s too short.
  3. Take off the dark eyeliner and nail polish once in a while, you’ll feel lighter.
  4. Chop off your hair if you want, it will grow back eventually.
  5. Count the freckles on your arms and draw lines between them, your skin is like the night shy.
  6. Sleep under six blankets with the fan on high in the middle of the winter, the sound is soothing.
  7. Tell that boy to stop touching your thigh, even if it is flattering.
  8. Say thank you and flash a smile when your sister says that your outfit is ugly.
  9. Raise your hand when you know the answer, even if the class is all upperclassmen.
  10. Read that book again, you’ll notice something you didn’t the first time.
  11. Don’t drink too much caffeine, you’ll get the jitters and bomb your math test.
  12. Wear pencils behind your ears, it’s convenient.
  13. Try to talk to people, it won’t kill you.
  14. When a cute boy tries to cheat off your test, write the wrong answers and change them later.
  15. It’s ok to feel happy, don’t let other peoples sadness make you feel bad.
"
-advice for sad teenage girls that own too many flannels (via thelarrystylinson)

theirs:

notthebatman:

theirs:

a zoo of dogs dressed up as other animals

sounds like a shih tzu

I’m going to kick your ass